15th December
Last night was the second session of the L.I.F.E course and again it was really good. I'd had a rough time during the day. Was fine during the course and then felt sort of flu like afterwards - but it didn't come to anything.
It's been removed, the Mirena - was a piece of cake - didn't feel a thing - didn't even realise she'd removed it - the placing of the speculum was the most uncomfortable thing. So relieved - I swear, I have less lower abdominal discomfort already. Nearly four years....wow. It will be interesting to see how the next couple of months pan out.
Felt quite good for a while after getting that out - but going to the Mall with DH to get some Christmas shopping done perhaps wasn't a good idea....bright fluorescent lights, people everywhere...pushing and shoving....it was too much....my head developed a cramp on the left hand side and I felt very unsteady and woozy.
Completely freaked out once home....crying and crying - I can't describe it - unbelievable distress, discomfort, torture - every minute of every hour. So exhausted from all this.
16th December
And again today - despite using distraction techniques; still the unsteadiness and sudden woozy spells - then off I'd go again - freaked out, shitting myself (literally). It didn't help that I was picking up my son and another boy from their last day at school and look after them both for three hours. How could I possibly do it? Visions of myself passing out and leaving two 5 year old boys to their own devices.
I have noticed though - I do breathe very shallowly - I must be chronically hyperventilating. I tried to breathe more deeply - you know...that diaphragmatic breathing. It only made me more aware of by body......
Its been a really rough week....and now Aunt Flo seems to have arrived again - early...perhaps that's why all the panic. Premenstrual. Tomorrow should be better.
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